What should I do for my birthday?
So, I got my A-levels: BBC wah wah...big deal right? I mean..yeah, I'm glad but I don't really know what to say/do in terms of reacting to them. Tillie got A*AC, amazing. It seemed my mum was happier and more proud for her than she was for me. A simple "well done...I'm proud of you" and we haven't spoken about it since. I can't blame my mum really though. I'm not going to Uni so I guess she thinks I don't care about my grades. Also, she doesn't really get the whole "grade boundaries" really. I suppose I could tell my mum I got FFU and she would say the same thing. No offence, mum.
I also quit Poundland (not that I've spoken about that job on here before). Well, when I say "quit" I mean, I never called up to say I would be off today so I'm hoping they know I won't be in ever again. I may regret it sometime soon but for now, I hate it there. I need the weekend to myself, really. I mean, working all week 9-5:30 then not getting home until 6:30, it's harder than it sounds. You may call me stupid but I know I'm doing the right thing - health is way more important than a petty £42 a week. It's quite beneficial actually too. Especially with this new, amazing job I have at Moore Media. So many opportunities come up for me to go to certain events at weekends but I've never been able to because I've been working so now, I can.
On the plus side, it's my birthday soon. 15 days to be exact. Birthdays seem to be coming closer and closer as I grow older. My 18th feels like it was only last week. Wow, I'll be 90 soon! Although I have had practically a whole year to plan what it is I want to do for my 19th, I still don't know what to do. I had this one idea, to go to some place in Manchester called "Jump Nation". Basically, an entire room filled with trampolines - the walls, the roof, the floors - the place is covered in them. I thought the idea would be great until I realised I had like what...0 people to invite to it. It seems the people I am there for most, don't seem to want to be there for me. Why is that? Why is it that at one point in my life I had so many happy, lovely people around me and now I just have my family (who I completely adore).
Danielle tried though, I suppose. Saying she would invite Ste (her boyfriend) and she would book it for me. As much as I want to have fun on my birthday with my sisters and Ste, it wouldn't be the same as having friends around me. Sometimes I just wish I had more people to rely on, I guess. Bouncing around in a room filled with trampolines with Danielle, Tayla and Ste will feel like we're there for Danielle's birthday, not mine. I have Tillie - 100% though - but I am kind of starting to get the feeling she wants to move on with the next chapter in her life (which is Uni) and leave me behind in her 'old life', so to speak. She will meet lots of new people who she will have so much more in common with than me and slowly she will forget about me. It's sad but, I know it's going to happen - I can feel it already. We haven't seen eachother in almost a month. Which to some might not seem like much but, to go from seeing her every day to only seeing her once a month, it's hard. She's my best friend and I suppose I'm just starting to miss her. I miss being around people of the same age group as me. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love love love the people I have around me at the moment; my mum, Danielle, Tayla, Nan, Colette, new friends; Gemma, Rich, Pippa & Jayne, but there is still a small part of me that wishes I could have someone to relate to and have someone to talk to about 'being 18/19 problems'. I suppose I'm being silly though. Not everyone has friends of the same age group. I have one friend and she is slowly slipping though my fingers. *Cue Slipping Through My Fingers by ABBA*
To anyone, if anyone, that reads this - please reply with some of your troubles at the moment. Declaring your troubles to people who don't know you is so much better than keeping them bottled up inside. It works a lot!
Also, give me some tips/tricks on what I can do to make my birthday (September 15) a whole lot better (with or without friends) and any ideas as to what I can actually do.
Until next time,
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